So I’ve got Cancer; Breast Cancer, or Invasive Ductal Carcinoma if you want it's Sunday name! Further in technical terms its triple negative (not hormone related), aggressive, stage 3, or in simple terms; the size of a golf ball, which, in that little ‘A’ cup of mine is relatively large, so there is no option but to remove the breast – A mastectomy…..this week, followed by chemo and radiotherapy to zap the surrounding tissue to get it all out.
The good news is, it hasn’t spread, although its aggressive (and therefore I will have to have all the lymph nodes removed as well) I am all clear everywhere else; which is a huge relief and allowed only for a very brief period of thoughts of mortality; besides Francesca is far too young to be remotely sympathetic to my little problem, and she remains as high-maintenance as ever! (Quite right too!) Jon and I are being as positive as possible, there is no other option really, it’s here, it needs to go and that’s all there is to it. I can’t feel any other way because there isn’t any mileage in it. It does feel surreal, but perhaps that is a good thing, its much easier this way to take it all as it comes, its all happened so quickly ( I found a lump about 8 weeks ago).
Am I scared? Of course, but mainly of the pain of the surgery and therapies, but my friend Gary tells me that pain doesn’t hurt so that’s nothing to worry about! I’m also scared of missing out on doing the things we are supposed to do with our baby girl in her first year. That just about sums it up really, forgive the forthcoming blurb that I will be pouring out here............
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